Thursday, March 25, 2010

In Soviet Russia, Bad Jokes and Other Nonsense Delete YOU! - Bad Jokes and Other Deleted Nonsense

From Laser Soup

Have you ever wanted to eat lasers but found their natural texture too unwieldy for any practical culinary procedure? If so then you are either a mad scientist, Emeril Lagasse, both, neither, or an offspring of the two. Or perhaps.. a demon?

Seriously though, Laser Soup is an extract of the natural flavors from lasers into a rich stock which, when combined with other things like meats, veggies, CD jewel cases, and pictures of grandma from before she had a stroke and her face got locked in that horrible, horrible grimace, can be a truly delectable soup!

Laser Soup was instantly catapulted into the global spotlight when unheard-of indie-rock band Spoon sang its praises on their equally unheard album "A series of sneaks." Spoon has a large homosexual following but you dont have to be gay to enjoy laser soup (just kidding, you do). What's that? oh okay ill do it after im done typing this article

Laser Soup can come in a variety of flavors depending on the time-era from which you obtained your lasers. If you got it from a long time ago and from a galaxy far far away your lasers will probably be green and go zaap! If you got it from the future aboard the star trek enterprise your laser will probably be totally boring and have some insipid social commentary it tries to shove down your throat (delicious!). If you obtained your lasers from my kitchen then rest assured I know who you are and I've already called the police.

In conclusion, george washington was a hippie who grew and smoked hemp almost every day and should not be on the dollar bill.

*Raucous laughter*

Posted via web from jelloegg's posterous

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